🌻 power ranking politician social media accounts
Zohran, Lurie, the Department of State
In response to my recent interview with the Trump-supporting founder, readers seemed shocked by how uninformed and vibes-based his political choices were. A few even accused me of inventing a fake guy to be maximally rage-inducing.
The guy, to be clear, is not made up. I went into the conversation blind, and was ready to hit publish on whatever he told me. But I don’t think he’s that unusual either. Far too much journalistic attention is devoted to dissecting the Curtis Yarvins of the world, who spend their days beefing with fellow thinkbois and spinning convoluted manifestos about the downfall of democracy. If anyone is unrepresentative, it’s Moldbug!
I’d instead wager that the mythical “median voter” is not dissimilar from the founder I spoke with. Such a voter is a casual political observer, who skims the news to stay informed, but spends most of his energy focused on practical concerns: running a business, making a living, non-electoral hobbies and friendships. He is not paying for weedsy Substacks about permitting reform, and has probably never been to a protest. He has two pet issues and tracks candidates’ positions on them. Politics appears every few years at the ballot box and as an ambient feature of his media environment. And in an unprepped interview with a journalist, he will probably get some stuff wrong.
Of course, my wonkier friends are allergic to this style. They hate that anyone makes personality-based decisions instead of reading econ RCTs and IFP blogs. They yearn, sometimes subtly and sometimes explicitly, for a less democratic and more elite-led form of government. State capacity, they think, should come for free. And if our current appointees are incompetent, we should simply hire better ones.1
But politics has been aesthetics for far longer than Twitter or TikTok has existed. George W. Bush was the infamous “have a beer” candidate. JFK was the TV guy. Trump mastered the tweet and viral phrase. Each new medium gives rise to a new political archetype. Or as Paul Graham wrote after Dubya’s reelection in 2004, “It’s charisma, stupid”:
But when I think about why I voted for Clinton over the first George Bush, it wasn't because I was shifting to the left. Clinton just seemed more dynamic. He seemed to want the job more. Bush seemed old and tired.
PG’s rationale isn’t so different from that anonymous founder!
The thing is, there is no mandate of heaven in a democracy. It is the fundamental challenge of electoral politics to earn voters’ trust. Centrist technocrats and the social justice left both share the smug proclivity to tell people to “educate yourself.” But the smartest people excel at explaining the complex and making hard things simple. Communication and persuasion are essential to the civic process.
Moreover, vibe-voting is not as unimaginable as it might seem. Just as managers hire for soft skills as well as hard ones, most people vote for personalities and values, not just records and reports. We all know that campaigns over-promise and under-deliver. Radical change is rare and pushback is inevitable. The question, then, is what leader to trust to beat the system anyway.
(Story without substance is obviously no good either. My small-brain theory of politics is that the government exists to do two things: First, it must deliver tangible outcomes through good policy. Second, it must own those successes through effective comms. This post is only about the latter.)
Anyway, the NYC mayoral race has reignited a personal fascination with political aesthetics. So here is a cherry-picked, policy-agnostic, uncomprehensive, entirely vibes-based power ranking of politician social media accounts:
S Tier
Daniel Lurie
I have to respect Mayor Lurie for fighting and winning a serious uphill battle. He was a relative unknown: a billionaire heir self-funding his campaign, sailing to the top on #2 ranked votes, right into the chaos of America’s most progressive, corrupt, and maligned city government. And unlike many others on this list, Lurie is not AOC levels of telegenic—not even close.
Fixing SF requires more than good posts. But his video game is up there with the best and has done a nontrivial amount to bolster goodwill. The mayor gives equal spotlight to restaurant openings, homelessness, and YC Startup School, declaring “This is a Big Deal.” and “Let’s go San Francisco!” with the stilted enthusiasm of a finance dad at a softball game. When Lurie broke the news that my favorite SF bakery is opening a second location at Pier 70, it became the first piece of politician content I’ve ever organically shared.
What I appreciate about Lurie’s socials is that he keeps it short, straightforward, and gimmick-free. He doesn’t pretend to be anything he’s not. The videos are well-lit and framed but not overproduced. After all, I don’t expect—or want—fancy crowd work or wild transitions. The mayor has better things to do. The videos are just an easy way to keep up with what his government is doing for me.
Lurie’s online presence is also especially impressive in contrast to former Mayor London Breed. Though she’s more politically experienced—and a vastly warmer real-life presence—her Instagram page is a pallid disaster.
Congrats Mayor Lurie, and let’s gooo San Francisco.
Donald Trump
In 2025, I’m glad that we can finally admit that Donald Trump is funny. I’m still impressed at the number of Trumpisms that have made their way into everyday vocab—fake news, people are saying this, many such cases, Sad!
Scrolling through his Truth Social, I can also see why voters feel connected to him. Trump is clearly writing his own tweets. His report-backs on calls with foreign leaders feel like he’s debriefing over drinks with the girls, not putting out a manicured press release. The random all-caps phrases are even sort of endearing in a boomer way.
Constantly lying, zero morals, idiotic policies, criminally corrupt, etc. But rhetorically… Trump’s still got it.
A Tier
Zohran Mamdani
Thanks to the internet, every exciting local election is now national news. And you’ve surely seen Zohran, the DSA darling taking the NYC mayoral race by storm. He’s stacking views on owned platforms, and getting tons of organic, bottom-up traction too. Zohran even got his own lookalike contest in Prospect Park!
My only nit is that the videos are almost… too cute? Like, you can tell that his mom is an acclaimed indie filmmaker. Or that as recently as 2019, Zohran was still a Soundcloud rapper going by “Young Cardamom.” It’s giving Bed Stuy, diaspora chic, small liberal arts college, campaign rally at the MJ Lenderman concert. It’s giving “I spend more time working my angles than my budget proposals.” Like seeing a dude with an 8-pack, I get suspicious when the visuals are a little too clean.
At the same time… he’s such a cutie pie (those dimples!) that I basically forgive him for the wackier proposals. Sorry!
The Utah Department of Transportation
I am a sucker for mundane state government agencies with weird and hilarious social media presences. There’s Washington’s Department of Natural Resources, @njgov, and most recently, the Utah DOT. The zoomer speak is less cringe when they aren’t campaigning for anything but a little more respect for your tax dollars. Also, infrastructure should be fun!
B Tier
Pete Buttigieg / Chris Murphy
and are working the centrist and populist sides of the same new media playbook: Start a Substack, grow a beard, and begin nakedly vying for the 2028 Democratic nomination.The newsletters aren’t terrible (though Murphy’s is better IMO). The main criterion for a politician Substack is that it must sound as stylistically far from a normal campaign mailer as possible. Do not write thirsty subject lines like “It’s Kamala, I need you.” Do not ask for a $50 donation. Do not sully the email with bright red buttons and all-caps-bolded-underlined text. And please please please make it easy to unsubscribe.
Still, I don’t know who Buttigieg and Murphy are courting with this strategy, because it’s certainly not the young and alienated. “Substack user” is a distinct class of voter—the kind of person who gets push notifications from 5 different news apps, has a 90% turnout rates for primary elections, and harbors oddly strong opinions on filibusters and RCV. In 2022,
analyzed the most common words in Substack profiles, and at the top of the list was “Retired.”But anyway, back to the facial hair. I think I need a political consultant to explain this to me. Are these guys chadifying themselves, so they can win back disaffected men? Or are they aiming to seem older and more rugged—experienced enough to be commander in chief? Either way, I still get jump-scared every time Pete’s beard accosts me on Substack Reels.
Gavin Newsom
This Is… Gavin Newsom had a lot of potential. The California governor seemed just bro-y and charismatic enough to pull off the longform podcast thing, and I liked that he reached out to right-wing influencers who most Democrats won’t touch. The Charlie Kirk episode was quite good, and I was surprised to hear Newsom admit that his son was a fan.
But
’s greatest vulnerability has always been the transparency of his ambition, the slipperiness of his convictions, and a thick coat of Bateman-esque politician slime that he makes no attempt to scrub off. I listened to the Steve Bannon episode recently, and Newsom reminded me of the number of times he replies “One hundred percent!” and “I appreciate that!” to Bannon’s wildest takes—whether tax cuts, tariffs, or Trump winning the 2020 election.When Newsom does defend his party, it often sounds like a canned ad for his own California achievements. (“I 100% align on industrial policy. I say that as governor of the largest manufacturing state in America, a state that has more corporate headquarters than any other,” he says in response to a weird tangent about Greta Thunberg and deindustrialization.) And Newsom’s feud with Trump over deportations is going well right now, but when you listen too long, you realize that Newsom doesn’t seem to have beliefs so much as agendas—and those two are very different.
Newsom also launched a Substack while I was drafting this, but no beard yet. I wouldn’t cover up that jawline either.
C Tier
Anthony Weiner
Cons: Sexted a minor, tweeted out a picture of his dick.
Pros: I started listening to The Adam Friedland Show after that GQ profile and, well, it’s pretty fucking funny. And Anthony Wiener—for all his extremely serious flaws—can really dish it back.
For this reason, he wins the battle of the Wieners.
D Tier
Scott Wiener
I like the guy as a legislator, but I cannot take seriously someone who melodramatically decamps to Bluesky while staying utterly addicted to X.
JD Vance
Mr. John David Vance2 is a man of mystery. His Substack profile, created five years ago, only says “Reader.” He pays for
(surprisingish) and (not), and of course reads and too.
Vance often goes Twitter-silent when the world needs him most. But you just know the guy’s got takes. He’d quit the whole VP thing and become a full-time Substacker if his elite-striver-inferiority-complex didn’t keep him gunning for the presidency. I bet he’s got an anon Twitter alt, a folder of heavily commented Google Doc RFCs, and participates in at least 30 daily active Signal chats. Behind those thick lashes and pained smile, there’s a caged bird waiting to get free.
Unfortunately, he’s busy baiting Bluesky users instead:
F Tier
The State Department
When the
Substack appeared on my Notes feed, I first assumed it was a fraud. But nope—Little Marco is out posting Europoor takes alongside 25-year-old polisci grads.
Their post comments are also wild. Apparently, as a government body, they can’t moderate them without getting in trouble on First Amendment grounds? As for why they don’t turn them off… only the lord knows.
Ultimately, I do not know why this Substack exists or what its goals are. Please enlighten me.
There was a time when politicians were scared of speaking out. I have friends who, planning to run for office someday, refuse to blog or tweet, lest they say something off. This seems anachronistic and counterproductive. The influencer-politician boundary is already collapsing; at least two Substackers have posted their way to the White House; I predict we will have a political creator win elected office within the next 4 years. We are already entering a post-cancel-culture era. Everyone has demons in their internet archives—please don’t dig up my old op-eds—so a scrubbed social history looks far more suspicious than a noisy and confusing one. Just look at Trump: it’s not about message discipline, but flooding the zone.
I also think one reason moderates have floundered in recent elections is their refusal to play the attention game. They insist that policy is enough, and if only voters studied harder, the US would be governed by enlightened neoliberals instead of drum-beating populists. But we don’t live in that world, and won’t anytime soon. Could Abundance even have taken off without Ezra Klein’s podcast stardom? I think not.
If I were a political donor, I would cut the tsk-tsking and focus on recruiting the most maximally magnetic avatar to enact my policy program. Wag fingers all you want, but don’t bet against charisma.
Thanks for reading, and let me know if you find a politician podcast that’s actually good.
Jasmine
(I’m actually mostly pro-technocrat, I just think they should remain behind the scenes.)
I had him in F tier at first, but bumped him up because I wanted to give the State Dept. a tier of its own.
Was going to quibble on Lurie vs Mamdani, but the more I think about it the more I’m convinced — obviously, in a raw appeal sense, I’m more taken in by Zohran (and going from 1% to within spitting distance of Cuomo is clear proof of the strategy working, while IDK how much of Lurie’s success comes from his social media).
But the Mamdani social media campaign works at least in part because of Zohran’s own charisma — which is not really a blueprint for any insurgent political movement, unless we think we can find very-adorable-but-message-disciplined 30-somethings in every major municipality and statehouse. The Lurie model instead feels sustainable, a frame that could be retrofitted to any number of politicians (I could see, say, Brad Lander wearing it well. And also probably other politicians who are not middle aged Jewish men, just to be clear!)
This post made me cackle IRL